


home is where you are

by Lemres



Category: Senyuu.
Genre: First Kiss, M/M, Panic Attacks, Pre-Canon, its not really explicitly said that its a first kiss but It Is, quite a bit of italics dgfhgfshgf, very slight mentions of death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-22
Updated: 2018-08-22
Packaged: 2019-06-30 20:24:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,382
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15759030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lemres/pseuds/Lemres
Summary: Ross is full of surprises, but it always makes him feel better; even just a bit.





	home is where you are

**Author's Note:**

> ive kinda realized that many of my fics are for [yuno](https://yuunhow.tumblr.com/) and this one isnt an exception. thanks for dragging me into a dead fandom and then giving me this idea like. 4 months ago dfkjghdfsg
> 
> also i barely remember anything from senyuu :)

_ It’s too much. _

The darkness of everything around him and the possibility of a monster like the one he’d seen only hours prior was simply  _ too much _ for the young hero to bear.

_ Ross. _

Tears well up and his body grows cold. His brain shuts down and grows hazy and suddenly Alba  _ can't breathe _ and even his quick, short gasps does nothing to help.

He left Ross with that monster, alone.

It’s dark in the cave he found to hide in, when the haziness of his mind took over and he knew he couldn’t run for much longer. It’s dim and cold and Alba could swear he keeps seeing  _ something  _ move in the corner of his eye, further in the dark, decrepit cave.  _ More monsters _ , he thinks, and he struggles to not wail, to make himself known to whatever lurks in the dark.

Lightning strikes outside quickly followed by thunder that shakes him, and he hides into his knees like he’d become camouflage, hidden in the darkness. His mind supplies him with darker thoughts. Maybe these monsters are big and prey on humans. Maybe they’ll find him and kill him before he can defend himself or even react, and his adventure will be cut short as he dies alone, without seeing Ross again.

It’s too much, and there’s nothing Alba can do but hug his knees as he panics and cries at the idea of never seeing his companion, and he’s so shaky that he doesn’t hear something alive and  _ very real _ enter the cave until he sees the movement in the corner of his eye.

“Oh, so  _ this _ is where you’ve been. Didn't know you were so afraid you’d run so far to hide.” The light jab is like venom to Alba, stinging far more than it should. He curls up further into his position, hugging his knees tighter than ever as he tries to will himself into vanishing for good.

He ignores Ross’ teasing in favor of trying to control his breathing, but it’s so stuffy and  _ hot _ within the confines of his own arms that he leans back onto the rocky cave wall and struggle to even his breathing.

He’s acutely aware of Ross approaching, but he doesn't dare look to him. He’s shaking all over and another jolt of lightning and near immediate crack of thunder spurs on his fears and he hides into his knees again.

“Hey. Hero.” Ross tries again, and Alba only tenses, keeping a deathgrip on whatever he can grab on himself as he tries to simply shrink away. “What happened?” Ross prods, and Alba can  _ hear _ the frown in his voice and has to hold down the sudden guilt because  _ he made Ross upset and- _

He looks up. He looks up at Ross as he stands closer to the mouth of the decrepit cave, his figure clear in the darkness outside. Lightning strikes nearby and in the fleeting seconds of light, he sees a mix of shock and surprise painted on his face.  _ Impossible _ , his brain tells him,  _ there’s no way Ross could care that much _ , but he pushes the idea away.

“ _ Ross.” _ He chokes out the name, cracked from minutes of sobbing and inability to even breathe. He longs for the soldier to come closer, to sit with him so he can curl up in the warmth in another until he can think straight once again, but he can’t bring himself to.

They stay like that, then, and Alba regrets this. He wants to stand back up, to wipe his own tears away and smile like nothing was happening. Like he could breathe or think or talk right again, even if Ross looks looks down at him forever for running away again.

But he doesn’t move, doesn’t think, and doesn’t notice that Ross was moving to him, slow like he thought Alba would suddenly find strength in his legs and bolt again. It’s not until he has to crane his neck directly up to see the barely-lit outline of Ross’ face that he realizes time is moving without him.

Alba hears rather than watches Ross slide down the rocky wall to sit by him, small rocks scraping against the floor as he moves. He looks away then, struggling and failing to even his breathing, the air in his throat dry and scratchy with each gasp. He didn’t want Ross to see him,  _ still _ doesn’t, really, but he can’t seem to find his voice anymore.

Something touches his bare arm, slides towards his hand and Alba jolts but otherwise doesn’t protest. He watches as Ross pries his tight grip away from his clothes, offering little resistance despite the conflicting needs of getting away and curling into Ross flooding his senses. 

“Talk to me.” Ross says, and Alba can’t tell what he’s thinking or feeling, but he  _ wants _ to speak, if he could, but he thinks Ross’ hand coming into his own is helping him, if just a bit.

“I,” Alba tries, in between steadily slowing, shaky huffs of breath and he almost feels embarrassed at how his voice cracks and squeaks at the same time. “I ran. I saw that monster and got scared and I  _ ran _ and you could have  _ died _ and-” Alba has to stop; panic wells in him again and he struggles to even his breathing.

Ross doesn’t say anything, but rather tugs Alba closer to him by his hand. He melts into Ross then, pressing his face into his chest and his shirt’s soggy and wet and  _ cold  _ but it still radiates a vague warmth and comfort that soothes him. Alba openly sobs, tears dripping onto Ross as he holds onto him with his free hand.

“You could have died,” Alba croaks, “because of me, that monster could have killed you and I would have been left alone. I thought there were monsters in here, too, and I would have died too because I couldn’t move.”

Ross lets go of his hand, slowly, and Alba lets him, settling to hold onto his shirt with both hands instead, pressing close to him. He feels one of Ross’ arms curl around him, and one hand combs smoothly through his hair. He squirms, although slightly, to get himself comfortable, before melting into Ross and his comforting touch.

They stay like this for so long that Alba’s not sure how long it takes for his breathing to even out, for his tears to stop and his mind to clear, but by the end his fear subsides and he’s left with exhaustion.

“‘M tired.” Alba whines, his arms held securely around Ross’ midsection.

“I’m not sleeping in a cave, hero.” Ross huffs, but there’s no real bite to his words as he lightly tugs at Alba to keep him awake. It works, and he sluggishly brings himself to sit up once more.

“But it’s storming.” Alba partially complains, partially argues before realising immediately after that there  _ is _ no more rain outside. What little of the light outside streaming inside indicating that it was sunset, nearly dusk but light enough that they could get to the next town before dark, should there be no more inconveniences.

He’s not sure if he really saw it from the lack of light, but he thinks he sees Ross roll his eyes before he stands, pulling Alba up with him and slipping his fingers in with his own. “We’re going.” Ross says, and Alba has no real strength to complain or argue, somewhat hazy, but slowly coming back to his senses the more they walk to exit the cave.

“No one’s held my hand before.” Alba muses as Ross drags him along, sleep lightly brushing the edges of his voice. 

“Aw, do you need more hand-holding?” Ross snorts, and Alba snaps up to retort, but is stopped short by Ross jerking him closer. Alba stumbles from the sudden jolt, and practically falls into his arms. Alba stutters, struggling to offer an apology but stops short when Ross silences him with his mouth pressed against his.

The kiss was chaste, and so quick that Alba has no time to react before Ross pulls away. Alba stares up at him, eyes wide and blinking owlishly as Ross snickers at him. “Let’s go.” Ross hums, dragging Alba to the dim light ahead.

**Author's Note:**

> [say hi to me](https://tillerino.tumblr.com/) im lonely


End file.
